Winning by Losing

Uncle Sami was a smiling, friendly and generous person. He would make the whole neighbourhood happy at the beginning of the month when he received his pension. He didn't buy melons and watermelons by the grain. He would buy it by the case and distribute it to the whole neighbourhood. He would make pita bread and invite the children of the neighbourhood. He would treat them with warm pita bread and pastries. Uncle Sami's children would be satisfied with the smile on their faces. Everyone would admire Uncle Sami's generosity. If someone came from outside the city, their first address was clear without thinking. ‘Let's stay at Uncle Sami's, we'll be comfortable.’ they would say. Uncle's power was in his choices. While making choices in his life, he never thought about his momentary interests. He always looked at the total benefit. When he shared his own means, he saw that the whole of life was more abundant. Sharing with people, meeting needs, benefiting someone... These were actually his biggest gains. And no pleasure could replace this. That's why he never had a problem like buying a new house. But he beautified his house with guests. He was not interested in buying a new car, but he cared about travelling with his loved ones in his car.

Experiential Design Teaching says; ‘What is more important than the comfort of the place is the comfort of the neighbourhood’.

Again one day, Uncle Sami was sitting on the balcony, watching the passers-by. He saw his niece Betül in front of the shop below. Betül, just like her uncle, was a generous, full-hearted, cheerful and thoughtful child. She was going to start secondary school this year. Betül was staring at her old shoes and the shoes in the shop window. 

Knowing the situation of his family, he couldn't say ‘I want a new one’ even though it was old. Uncle Sami understood the situation. He went down to his niece. ‘Sweet Betül, how are you? What are you doing here?’ he said. Betül with her hands behind her back with a bitter smile: ‘I just walk around,' she could only say. Uncle Sami: ‘Which of these shoes do you think is nice? I want to buy them for myself.’ Betül said, ‘No, Uncle Sami, these are for children, not for you.’ Uncle Sami said, ‘You think so, I guess you are right, so which one would you buy?’ Betül said, ‘Well, let me think about it. I think the black one with the ribbon in front is nice.’ Uncle Sami secretly bought the shoes Betül liked while she was playing. He also learnt about the school necessities from her mother and prepared a nice package and dropped it off at their home. Betül was overjoyed. In the evening she covered all her notebooks with joy. She put her shoes on her bed and went to sleep. Betül had learnt a lot from Uncle Sami. She prayed while sleeping and promised to be a charitable person like him when she grew up.

When does one really win?

Betül was a successful student. She was studying well with the support of Uncle Sami. Uncle Sami passed away during the years she finished secondary school. Betül and the whole neighbourhood was very sad. His absence was felt everywhere. His children modelled their father's lifestyle. They were well brought up, they were loyal. The neighbourhood would remember Uncle Sami with prayers and thanks.

Uncle Sami, a retired civil servant, was very rich. He was rich in heart, rich in understanding, rich in meeting needs. Moreover, he was richer than those who had much more opportunities than him. He had bequeathed the answer to the question ‘How to have a profitable life?’ with his life. He had endeavoured to be a good person throughout his life. He would not listen to people's negative sentences such as ‘You spend a lot, what will be left for your children, don't we know how to distribute to everyone?’. Because he knew that there were things in this life that were more important than material wealth. He would not try to explain this to those who did not understand. He would smile and change the subject. He was poor according to some people and very, very rich according to others. Well;

- Which poverty should a person prefer to wealth? 

- Which gain should she/he prefer to loss?

Losing while winning or winning while losing? Where should a person spend his labour, time and money? Is it a matter of living with momentary pleasures or being happy in the totality of life?

The decision is up to us. It is in our hands to make more profitable choices!

&

Experiential Design Teaching enables us to make our lives easier with consistent, applicable, understandable and useful information. With this information, people learn how to communicate more effectively with their family, friends and customers.